Yet again, another highly entertaining visit at the doctor’s office…
After waiting nearly an hour for an appointment, the receptionist opened the window and announced, to a packed waiting room, the doctor was running 45 minutes late.
Her statement was met with a collective groan. Then, in unison, several elderly men stood up and immediately complained:
“Let me get this straight. I called for an appointment, and you gave it to me. Then you called me to confirm the appointment so I confirmed it again. Then you left me another message to call the morning of the appointment –which I did this morning – to re-confirm my twice confirmed appointment. Doctor so and so is very concerned with my timeliness, but where is the courtesy that is due to me? Not once this morning did it occur to you to tell us the doctor was late!”
It was a classic Seinfeld moment. By then, 5 or 6 irate Frank Constanzas had assembled near the front desk, each one complaining and demanding to see a supervisor.
The receptionist swiftly closed her I-wish-this-was –a-bullet-proof window with a lyrical “Just a second!” The men, now circumstantial accomplices, murmured amongst themselves. Canes in hand, they each tucked a magazine under their arm, zipped up their windbreakers and filed out the door, opting for egg salad sandwiches in the lobby. Grumbling, they vowed to send the doctor a bill for their valuable time.
“These colon/rectal doctors are such a pain in the ass!” muttered the last Constanza as he pushed his walker out the door, “No pun intended.”
February 2, 2010
“I guess this isn’t a medical appointment I would want to reschedule,” joked my father as we waited for his name to be called. I smiled. He’s right. After a 24 hour fast accompanied by a not-so-fun liquid laxative, the very last thing he wants to do is reschedule an appointment for the dreaded colonoscopy.
We sat and waited. And waited some more until 5 hours later, my mother’s name was called. As usual, my mother scheduled their procedures together. Through thick and thin, together they face everything – including their colonoscopies.
I waited while my parents recovered from their brief, drug induced sleep. Upon waking, the first thing each asked for was the other.
On the car ride home I was treated to a seemingly endless (and repetitive) description of what 1 gallon of liquid laxatives can do to a person. I thought the doctor had promised said they would be groggy and sleepy? No way. Those two were talking a mile a minute and comparing notes on unspeakable things I cannot bring myself to disclose.
Suffice to say, I am relieved the colonoscopies are over. Later this week we get to visit the cardiologist for “stress tests.” I expect that visit will be equally entertaining.
Ah. The joys of mid-life and beyond.
January 25, 2010